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Ways to Explore Your Sexual Boundaries to the Full

All of us have our limitations. After all, we're only human. But when it comes to sex, how many of us can say we've pushed ourselves to the limit?

an extreme sexual encounter
Let yourself slipp into a passionate exchange of erotic sentiments!

Have we experienced the heights of pleasure and sexual happiness? If not, why not? This article explores ways that you and your partner can expand your sexual ambitions, discovering deeper pleasures than anything you've experienced before.

1. Throw Away Your Preconceptions

The first thing any sexual explorer needs to do is simple: forget about the prejudices you've built up over the years about who you are and your sexual identity. Our identities are fluid, dynamic and adaptable.

Sure, they are anchored in biology, but it's all too easy to typecast yourself as "totally straight" is lesbian, when the truth is much more exciting.

2. Try Things, But Don't Put Pressure on Yourself to Love Them

There's a galaxy of sexual practices and communities out there, but here's the weird thing: people think about them and fantasize about them, then refuse to participate. They assume that swinging won't be for them and close their minds.

It's much better to open your mind and be willing to try new sexual acts - even just once - than to never try them at all.

3. Stock up on Sexual Props

If sex for you is just missionary intercourse on the same old bed, both of you are missing out. With a collection of dildos, strap-ons, vibrators and clamps, you can get creative - explore your interpersonal dynamics, try a little pain (all within safe limits, of course).

The thing is: if you have props around, you can let your imagination run riot.

4. Don't be Afraid of a Little Pornographic Stimulation

Most men and women watch porn, but rarely together. Isn't that strange? A pair of sexual partners could be watching porn separately, even at the same time, instead of sharing their personal tastes and letting on-screen experts inspire their own sexual exploits.

kinky BDSM in the bedroom
Maybe you want to experiment some form of S&M

Mutual porn sessions can unlock sexual potential in almost anyone, so don't shy away - stick on a movie.

5. Turn Everyday Conversations into Erotic Exchanges

Have you and your partner ever had phone sex or cyber sex? Have you slipped into a passionate exchange of erotic sentiments or turned your webcams on to share your love for each other?

It might seem odd at first, but long distance sex can be incredibly fulfilling and, done right, a bit of dirty chat can keep relationships going when distance intervenes.

6. Leave Your Sexual Comfort Zone

Everybody is in danger of falling into a sexual comfort zone, no matter how old or sexually experienced. It's human nature to let things slide when things are going OK, only to discover that a point comes when everything falls apart.

Never let that happen to you. Rebel against your laziness. Be positive about sexual experimentation. It's the only way to keep your sex life fresh.

7. Pain can be Your Friend in the Bedroom

Right. Now it's time to talk about S&M. Eventually, when couples start to experiment, they will reach some form of S&M stage, and it's nothing to worry about. Pain can be erotic, as you'll discover.

So spank, cuff, whip, gag away - whatever captures your imagination. But take things slowly. S&M isn't to be taken lightly, but if you approach it right, it can spice up your sex life for good.

8. Bring Some Strangers into the Picture

Sometimes, couples reach the limits of what they can achieve together (sexually speaking).

But that's not a problem, and here's why: You can keep pushing back the frontiers of sexual pleasure by organizing orgies, joining dogging meets or advertising for bulls to play their part in wild cuckolding sessions. Sex can be sociable too, so don't keep your experiments private.

9. Don't Be Constrained by Sexuality

It's common in our society to fashion a sexual identity for ourselves, whether that's heterosexual or gay (or many categories in between).

But wait a second: We're more interesting than that, and you might have been wrong. So if you feel the itch to explore, go back to basic principles. Think about same sex partners, anal sex and whatever comes to mind.

You never know what will turn you on until you've tried it.

10. Have "That" Conversation

Above all else, you and your partner need to talk about sex. You need to admit to each other that your sex lives aren't going as well as they could be, and find ways to mutually expand your erotic boundaries.

couple getting into a sexy role playing
Just embark upon life's greatest adventure of your sexuality.

That way, you can turn your boring old bedroom into a laboratory of lovemaking, conscious of each other's desire to explore what turns them on, and always alive to the need to be inventive and imaginative where it really counts.

Kinky Pro-Tips for Sexual Adventurers

So you've decided to embark upon life's greatest adventure: the exploration of the frontiers of our shared sexuality. When you are starting the journey, a few tips from the pros can definitely help, so here are a couple of nuggets to bear in mind:

  1. Come up with a collection of ideas, then randomly select them: When you first start experimenting, chat with your partner. Brainstorm some kinky possibilities and write them down. When you have thirty or so, put them in a cap and pick at random. That way, neither partner will feel that they are being short-changed or dominated (unless that's what the suggestion asks).
  2. Stay the course and be ready to try again: Treat your adventure like science. When scientists carry out experiments, they are ready for failures, but they repeat their work to make sure it holds water. Don't be depressed when something fails. Try it again or try something new, always maintaining a spirit of curiosity and sexual freedom.

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Image sources: (1) Artem Furman | (2) razoomanetu | (3) sakkmesterke | Fotolia.com