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Signs That You're Dating a Sapiosexual

It's no secret that dating is hard. You can meet someone new and have casual sex every night of the week, but ultimately, you may never find someone you're compatible with. However, when the search ends and you do find a partner, your love life can finally start making sense.

sapiosexual couple having a deep conversation
Try to have a philosophical conversation with sapiosexuals and turn them on!

That is, until you discover they may not be straight, homosexual, or even bisexual. What if they identify themselves as something different, such as a sapiosexual? Defined as someone who is attracted to intelligence, this sexual orientation has become increasingly common today.

To determine if you're dating someone who identifies as a sapiosexual, you must look for the signs below!

They're More Into Discussions Than Sex

One surefire sign you're dating a sapiosexual is the fact that they love having deep, meaningful conversations with you as means of foreplay. Whether you're discussing the meaning of life or human nature, they'll get fired up as the conversation gets deeper.

For most, a philosophical conversation can get them in the mood, even to do something as risque as public sex. However, keep in mind that for some, the conversation is going to be all they need to satisfy their sexual urges.

You're Intelligent and Constantly Learning

While you likely don't want to brag, chances are high you know whether or not you're smart. If you are, and you prioritize learning on a regular basis, then you likely attract sapiosexuals to begin with. If your partner loves having conversations with you, talks about your love of learning, or regularly calls you smart, then this may be the main reason they're with you.

PRO TIP: If you're not sure your partner is merely attracted to your brain, try having a basic conversation with them. If they try to change the subject or aren't interested in talking to you, they may be after your intelligence!

They Don't Emphasize Physical Appearance

Someone who truly identifies as a sapiosexual is going to be much more interested in your brain than your body. This means they may not care if you don't go to the gym, don't have the best style, or don't put a lot of effort into how you look every day.

Sapiosexual's boyfriend focused on his reading
Sapiosexuals are much more interested in your brain than your body.

Instead, they'll want to make sure you're constantly learning, whether by continuing your education or reading new books.

It's Not Your Money or Luxury What They want

Can't afford the finer things in life?

Keep in Mind:

For someone who is attracted to intelligence, this isn't a problem. For most, they aren't looking for a partner who can provide them with all the luxuries in life. While this is a definite benefit if you can, their main priority is that you can satisfy their intellectual needs.

They might display this by regularly having discussions with you or asking you questions about what your thoughts are on certain topics.

They Correct Your Grammar

Have you noticed that your partner corrects misspellings on text messages or tells you when you pronounced something incorrectly? Do they seem to be less attracted to you when these mistakes occur?

These are huge signs that you're dating a person who is deeply attracted to intelligence.

Unfortunately, these small mistakes could get you dumped pretty quickly. Most sapiosexuals will give only a few chances before they kick someone to the curb for improper grammar.

You Have the Ability to Express Emotion

Book smarts are at the top of the list for someone who is attracted to intelligence. However, that doesn't mean smarts in other areas are left in the dust.

For example, many people who relate to this sexual orientation appreciate a partner who can read their feelings and express their own openly. Empathy is important as well and something that can help them grow a strong foundation with you for the future.

PRO TIP: Important!

An important key to staying in a relationship with a sapiosexual is to be emotionally stable. If you are not at this point in your life, they may lose their attraction to you.

They Brag About Your Intelligence

You might find yourself blushing quite often because your partner is always bragging about how smart you are. In addition to this, they may bring up your credentials or how accomplished you are on a regular basis.

The compliments you receive the most are those that they value the most in you. An added bonus for them is if you have a career that requires extreme intelligence, such as one in finance or philosophy.

You Both Laugh Together

Humor is a sign of a healthy brain, especially for someone who can make their partner laugh. While you likely have a serious side that makes it clear how smart you are, good humor is something your partner is sure to love as well.

Don't be afraid to make a joke in the future, as it will only attract them to you more.

sapiosexual couple laughing together
Sapiosexuals will be seduced by your ability to make them laugh

How to Handle Dating a Sapiosexual

If you strongly suspect that you're dating someone who is turned on by your brain, then it's important to better understand this dynamic of your relationship.

Due to the fact that they're attracted to your intellect, it's important to maintain and continue to grow this as your relationship progresses. This will only benefit you in the long run by making you more attractive to the one that you're dating.

Keep in mind:

Sapiosexuals also go deeper in feelings than just a fling and hookup for the night.

However, if you find that it's too difficult to satisfy their craving for the biggest brain in the room, you may want to move on to someone who will appreciate the other qualities you have to offer.

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Image sources: (1) bobex73 | (2) Sergey Nivens | (3) Hugo Félix |